At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
