Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
