Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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