She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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