I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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