I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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