I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
