haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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