I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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