out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
