As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
