K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
