I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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