but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I just googled if crying burns calories
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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