k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
please don't ironically join a cult
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