you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
