just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
