quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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