the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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