you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
