Cold hands, warm shart.
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize