Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(979): View more from Texas

She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..

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(979): She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls.. http://tfl.nu/jxnm

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night

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(508): That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night http://tfl.nu/uf42

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(303): View more from Colorado

You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?

(720): View more from Colorado

Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.

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(303): You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher? (720): Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced. http://tfl.nu/qahj

Replies (35) Good night (12528) Bad night (1152)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.

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(401): Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight. http://tfl.nu/8i8j

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(225): View more from Louisiana

I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that

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(225): I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that http://tfl.nu/lb4l

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(406): View more from Montana

She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??

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(406): She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads?? http://tfl.nu/sqt6

Replies (22) Good night (1868) Bad night (2667)
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(607): View more from New York

you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship

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(607): you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship http://tfl.nu/e8ub

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest

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(724): Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest http://tfl.nu/2gbs

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS

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(978): I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS http://tfl.nu/o0md

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(908): View more from New Jersey

Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?

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(908): Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka? http://tfl.nu/zznq

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(865): View more from Tennessee

I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.

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(865): I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night. http://tfl.nu/z7o8

Replies (8) Good night (920) Bad night (239)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.

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(724): I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober. http://tfl.nu/htfr

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(940): View more from Texas

I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast

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(940): I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast http://tfl.nu/e3ki

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(224): View more from Illinois

I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.

(858): View more from California

I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.

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(224): I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman. (858): I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect. http://tfl.nu/7efm

Replies (3) Good night (569) Bad night (162)
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(847): View more from Illinois

I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce

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(847): I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce http://tfl.nu/nrhe

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