dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
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I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
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He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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