Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.