shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize