Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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