GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Randomize