I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
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Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
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All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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