my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
