with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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