i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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