Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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