maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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