Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize