But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Welp...herpes.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
