No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
