Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize