Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I can't put those talents on a resume
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
