Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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