idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
