I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
