Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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