Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Randomize
