This girl is more easily done than said...
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
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There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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