omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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