This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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