Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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