yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
