Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I walked into a room this morning and someone asked how my back was because I apparently threw myself off the porch after attempting to set myself on fire. Who the fuck let drunk me play with fire?!
Better question: who the fuck planted a tree next to the porch?!
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
