What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Randomize
