Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize