I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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