told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize